Well, its but a half-hour 'til my birthday. At least, it is if you are of the post-21 "birthday at midnight" mindset, and tonight maybe I am. I had planned some festivities, namely, getting drunk by myself at my house and seeing if I could eat a whole pizza. I would document the process, and it would be a kind of "fuck you" to age and wisdom and maturity. Then I actually got home from work and just felt tired and sad and oddly incapable. I still ordered the pizza, but not out of any youthful sassiness, more from an understanding that I would not be mentally fit to make spaghetti. Also, I have run out of such stapes as cheese, bread, and pickles.
I only ate one piece of pizza. I have a growing knot in my stomach that I am blaming on birthday anticipation, and its interfering with consumption. My birthdays have been pretty universally bad ever since the glory days of elementary school, when my parents got the snow cone machine and everyone in my class had to come to the party. Once in high school I tried to throw a party, a bonfire, and only two people came. They stayed for 15 minutes and then left to get high. Without me. On my 19th birthday I sat inside all day in a basement apartment, sick. The then-boyfriend gave me some sweaty daisies from the neighbor's yard. On my 21st I went out to a bar. Everyone was wasted except me. I bought myself a beer. Later that night, I had an incredibly confusing and heartbreaking encounter with a boy leading me to start my practice of deleting boy's numbers from my phone as soon as I get a crush. What will tomorrow bring? I am predicting sitting alone crying into an ice-cream cake, softly singing "Happy Birthday To Me."
This is barely believable, but I think writing this made me break out in hives. Whatvevs. Maybe I am just allergic to this delicious Hard Cider i am drinking. It is from Scrumpys, and is organic and from Michigan. It is fairly sweet, with a syrupy viscosity and pleasing golden texture. Softly carbonated, it is a great special Birthday Beer. See? Totally about food. I was just foolin' that whole time.
To make my aforementioned birthday nightmare/expectation Not Come True, come to my party this evening at Nick Certa's. He lives on Eastern and Wealthy. Animal masks not required, but encouraged. Kidding.