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I'm OK, UK OK

My dad informed me that I had mail accumulating at my parents' house and should pick it up soon. When I talked to my mom on the phone about the mail she noted, "Your dad wanted me to tell you that there's something from Great Britain too." I was immediately excited. I don't get mail from England. Who knows my address? Honestly, the top three ways I hoped/imagined the letters would start were:

1. Congratulations! Though you've made none, we've been following your progress in your fields of study [read: desire to study, or more aptly "fields of thought"] and believe that you are an asset to our institution who is needed immediately. Enclosed please find a ticket to Oxford, England. There is a plane waiting to take you there directly from Grand Rapids.

2. Dear Kevin,
It is with great pleasure that we welcome you, no matter at what age, to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft & Wizardry. Yes, magic is real! Come learn it. Enclosed please find a portkey to teleport you here immediately.

3. MI6 needs you to defend the English crown now. Enclosed please find a gun and shoot someone to get registered for your license to kill.

Sadly, the letter ended up being from a British internet hosting company wanting payment to renew my .co.uk domain. It's 90 pounds and I never cared about it. I don't even remember where it's being redirected so I can't change it. Maybe next time you'll send me better news, England.


Though her Lollapalooza performance disappointed me, I love the new M.I.A. album. I predict this song, Jimmy, to be a big club hit. A hit at clubs I'll never attend.

Comments

shes pretty//sri lankan; right ?

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