ohhh man. so you all know that the cycle of menstruation is an ordeal. well, let me just tell you, it messes up my life for a good few days. when everything makes me cry, and i just want to sleep so that i don't call anyone and tell them things that these strong emotions make me feel. and it's menstruation that makes me understand mental illness just a little bit. these emotions are very very real, but in a few days i won't remember how strong they were. i exclusively cry when i'm pms-ing. and i'll cry about anything. the dog yelping down the street, the thought of my dog being put to sleep, a wallet i lost 6 months ago, a car purchase, (matt, remember when i cried about the dishes?)
which brings me to another topic. f-ing change.
i'm buying a car.
kellie starts a full time job.
my friends are going back to canada.
my daizy (dog) is dying.
my sister is moving away.
my little brother is taller than me.
i just finished my year long internship.
and i can't keep up with it all. i could deal with the fact that "the only thing certain about life is that nothing stays the same" so much better when it wasn't changing so fast.
ok here's the positive (what's staying the same for a while at least)
i'm still going to walk and bike all the time, almost everywhere
greg is still here
kellie still wants to study
spring is coming
i have two other dogs back home
i'm almost completely done with school
i don't have to feel like a second rate citizen for not owning a personal vehicle.
(except i wish that i hadn't felt this way even when i didn't own a car)