DEAR MRS RACCOON

FUCK YOU BIKE PATH
stay safe. stay on the road.

yep finally got hit today. riding on a bike path of course.. because i wanted to take a nice easy boring ride to the cascade library. cruising along coming to an intersection.. ive got the green light to cross and the right of way and heyo traffic is a waitin at the red light to turn on to cascade giving me plenty of room to cross the street.
until im about five feet from the intersection and mrs foerster decides to go ahead and make that right turn on red and let me get intimate with the side of her suv.
but she was nice and more shaken than me i think.
gave me a ride home then to the police station to file a report as i went to the emergency room in fear of a broken femur which turned out to not be broken at all just REALLY swollen and nasty and black and blue and hurty = a bit of time on the crutches (and not on my bike :( ) and a pretty much useless right leg.
bummer.
but hey! i have a fresh prescription of vicodin if anyone wants to buy! (JOKE)
but really yeah i do ha. but not for sale you silly heads. that shit is going in the shredder. FUCK YOU TOO VICODIN.

yay for good timing!
boo for no respect!

oh yeah!
and to add insult to injury,,,
they gave me a tetanus shot at the hospital too!!!! FUCK! owwie :(

and to add compliment to injury...
doctor beth says i have a cute blush. giggle giggle (cute) blush giggle

Posted by sam at 11:00 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

in an instance of curiosity you look what happens here:when the worlds greatest show on this planet comes tumbling down from the solar skies to please and joy our pretty smiles and we ever accept it so very graciously the elephants dance the panda bears prance the clowns glance and the ring leader takes no chance when making a big corporate decision like the ones that little kids can not quite yet understand but only subliminally that hey owwwwy mom and dad do all dogs go to heaven? yes and the kritter krawlers reproduce ever so forever under that seat of yours probably to live the good life. the good life! THE CIRCUS LIFE! ITS THE CIRCUS LIFE FOR ME!

THE CIRCUS

erk. we are people from other planet. erk. we come to takes the childrens to fantasy love island. erk. zebra cakes and donkey boys for pay lovable so high in a glorious honor. erk.

its like this time.. the last time i remember going to a circus.. barnum and bailey at the the delta plex so many years ago, i bought this comb. the famous switchblade comb.

Posted by sam at 12:20 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

"i gave you your independence and then put on a rad fucking show to celebrate it!"
- thomas jefferson (july 4, 1780)

so... in honor of mr jefferson..

on the 228th anniversary of the first money jefferson celebrity weekend brought to you by thomas jefferson in a balls out attempt to get da blings for those kids...

we present to you the things that really make america AMERICA.

BOY SCOUTS BOMBS AND VEGETABLES.

(click for bigger!)

JULY 4, 2008
THE WINSLOWS
2308 Marcus
Lansing, MI
10 PM Bring Donations!

Insects With Tits (richmond/new orleans)
Nernes/Skagen (norway!)
Tahquamenon Falls
Hot Tapes
Jtango Knash
+
VEGAN POTLUCK/BBQ!!!! so bring some eats!

rad.

Posted by sam at 10:35 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

LEARNING CENTER:
america's number one go to book for learning about/how to use the grocery store.

THE GROCERY STORE

its almost as good as the feeling you get when mom lets you push the cart for the first time.

(a couple more of these books on the way!)

also

on monday.
come CHECK THIS.

5pm at the daac. $3.

the anti-federalists (gr punk ala nation of ulysses)
the sand dollars (local acoustic)

AND

you heard it here first.

and duel booted first release by killing kings funtime gang VICTORY! and HEGEMONICIDE split c40!

VICTORY! (new times two man hardcore)
Hegemonicide (one man grinder (with special guest monday only!)

Posted by sam at 5:55 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)