September 16, 2006
The Saddest Two Days Of My Life
It was the summer after I graduated ("'04 fo sho"). Karen and I had just started dating that March. I was so deeply in love...or what I thought love was. I remember the first time I freaked about the future of our relationship. I was in the parking lot, pushing carts at target. I suddenly realized that it might not last forever. It really had never crossed my mind. You see, Karen was going to work at YMCA Summer Camp. She'd be there everyday 24/7, with only a break once a week and every other weekend. I cried in the parking lot. I walked out real far, and cried.
When I got home I sent Karen and email about it. We talked online, and she said she didn't want to ever break-up. The time came for her to go camp. It was one of the saddest nights I have experienced (at least at the time). But, it wasn't all bad. Darin and I were soon to drive to Washington to go to "What The Heck Fest". This remains as one of the best vacations of all-time, probably always will. It was the first time either of us had been out on the road grown-up-less. The trip was full of mishaps, adventure and teenage awkwardness. I'll write about it some other time.
Karen and I tried to talk on the trip. But, I didn't have a cellphone, so I had to rely on Darin's. I think we talked three times the whole trip. This mostly because N. Dakota, Montana, Idaho and West Washington had zero service. Stupid states. The day I returned home I quickly called Karen. We talked for a half hour or so. Then suddenly, i'm not sure how it was brought up, but she decided she wasn't so sure about us. "There are so many boys out there, we can't make promises". My summer was over. I would die alone.
For the next two days (Karen was coming home in 2 days), I took drives and cried. But, mostly I spent all my time in my room writing sad songs about how I wanted Karen to love me as much as I did her. In two days I made 5 songs. When she came home I gave her the CD. We listened to it on the way to CVS to buy shampoo. It was awkward. When we got back to her house we talked about the situation. I have no idea why I lied, but I did. I told her, "It's okay. I understand. If you ever want to go on a date with another boy, it's fine. Do it. I won't care." Poor me.
Well, Karen has never needed to date another boy. We have been together for 3 years now, and we have looked at wedding venues with her mother. I'm not saying something could happen that would break us apart, anything is possible. But, both of us are pretty positive we want to spend forever together.
This was all brought up when I went back to listen to old songs. Here is the album I made for Karen:
Posted by cory at September 16, 2006 11:48 AM